midwife

Going from being couple to a family, in 24 hours

February 11, 2019 by Penny Leave a Comment

This blogging lark is hard work when you have a newborn in the house. In fact, I’m not even sure I’m allowed to call her a newborn any more. At what age do they stop being a newborn and become just a “baby”?

The truth is that my little Tube Stop Baby (as she’s become known online) has been with us for a whole three months now. She’s gone from a curled up little scrap of a thing, to a little baby that is already showing us heaps of cheeky personality and an ability to wind up her big brother by laughing at him when he has a strop. Smart girl.

I’ve been a bad blogging mummy though as the story of my pregnancy with her kind of petered out after writing about the final stages of pregnancy. Her actual arrival though was a bit of a rush and it takes me a while to remember all of the things that happened in the 24 hours that we were away from home. 24 hours which took Bonn and I from being a couple to being a family.

As I’d mentioned before here, my bump was measuring big so at 40 + 3 I was booked in to hospital to be induced. It was a Wednesday and my other two kids stayed at my house the night before so that morning I was up early to take them both to school, giving them both a huge hug in the playground knowing that by the time I saw them next the would have a little half brother or sister to welcome into the family. It was a strange feeling.

The hospital had said that they would phone me by 10am to let me know what time to come in. All through the school run I had one eye on my phone waiting for it to ring. Nothing. Back home we had time for a cuppa and a chat with my mum before my phone finally sprung into life at one minute to ten. Talk about leaving it until the last moment.

As I’d suspected the call was to say that the unit was busy. I’d fears about them telling me that I’d have to be delayed until the following day, but instead they told me to get there for 6pm that evening, as by then there would be a bed empty for me.

Six o’clock came and B and I rocked up at the hospital where we went up to the allocated ward and were shown to a bay, before being left somewhat to our own devices for a bit. I knew I might be in for a long wait so we were armed with a huge array of books, snack, board games etc and I’d even brought my sewing kit with me so I could finally fix the pocket in B’s coat. A job that I had been putting off for ages for no real reason.

Needle threaded I’d taken about two stitches before someone finally turned up and attached me to a monitor so that they could monitor the baby’s heart beat before starting the induction process. Now, back when pregnant this baby used to go nuts every single evening about 7pm. It was a regular thing that I would spend the evening sat on the sofa being exhausted by this child inside of me going into full on party mode summersaulting around my stomach. The things is apparently this isn’t usual the student midwife was a little puzzled to see what was going on.

Unfortunately all these acrobatics meant that it was pretty much impossible to get a stable trace of the baby’s heart. At the time we assumed it was all down to how much they were moving about, but the midwives were convinced that it might be something more concerning. There was talk about not being able to induce until they had had a stable trace for at least 30 minutes. No chance of that happening with this baby. Talk then turned to needing a c-section in case the baby had a cord wrapped around his or her neck. I’d had this with Little Miss C, but in that case it hadn’t been spotted until she was delivered.

They finally agreed to take me down to the delivery suite so that someone could take a look and see if they could break my waters. There were a few regular tightenings so they hoped that breaking them might help to kick things off naturally. Down we moved to a sauna of a room in the delivery suite. We were literally stripping off as soon as we arrived as it was so hot in there. There was more coming and going of midwives as they assessed what was happening and trying to decide what to do. One consultant seemed to think that a natural birth might be possible, but she was unsure. Still it was impossible to get a perfectly stable trace of baby’s heart.

I forget exactly why or when, but they did finally move us to a room that felt a normal temperature rather than being tropical and just before midnight a midwife did manage to break my waters. A consultant had by this stage agreed that a natural birth should be possible, but he wanted a very close eye keeping on things just in case baby’s heartbeat trace got any stranger than it already was.

As the night went on they started me off on a drip to try to bring on labour, but instead it just made baby’s heartbeat drop more so they stopped again until it came back up. Again the consultant came in and stretched his head a few times about what was going on. There was further talk about c-sections and the cord possibly being either trapped or wrapped round the baby’s neck in some way. At this stage I was convinced that it was how this particular birth was going to pan out and my head was starting to fill with all the logistical challenges of performing a 30 mile round trip school run when you can’t drive for 6 weeks.

The midwife herself was getting a little annoyed at the lack of progress and seemed convinced that natural labour would be possible and after lots of studying baby;’s heart trace it was finally agreed that we could try the drop one last time. Only a half measure though and at the first sign of anything even slightly irregular with baby’s heart it was to be stopped immediately. The consultant finally agreed and when the overnight midwife went off shift at 8am she was literally just waiting for one signature before I could be started on it again.

Our new midwife was a breath of fresh air after a long night and hear lovely bubbly style when she introduced herself to both of us (midwives please do remember to say at least hello to a woman’s birthing partner or the baby’s Dad – it’s not only polite, but also helps everyone feel a bit more confident about things) she said that she was determined that we’d have a baby in our arms by lunchtime. After such a long night of nothing really happening I laughed this off and she agreed that it night be a bit of a stretch target. Instead we agreed that by the end of her shift might be more realistic. I figured that within 12 hours that would at least have taken me into theatre to make things happen with surgery if everything else failed.

Around 9am all the paperwork was in place and a new drip was started. We chatted away for a while with me just hoping that the 2cm dilation (that was possibly just a hangover from previous births!) would finally increase. 10 o’clock came and went and I noticed that the tightenings were becoming a little tighter, but still nothing to write home about. I’d been allowed the gas and air for a while, and it was definitely helping with things. In my exhausted state I knew that things weren’t going to get any easier though. The midwife and I talked about additional pain relief and I decided that I would indeed like an epidural. The midwife agreed, but noted that I would need to be examined again. Something that they wouldn’t normally do until 1pm, four hours after the drip was started.

There was no rush, but she agreed to examine me again. By this point it was about half past ten. A bit more faffing about various things and she then finally got round to examining me at about quarter to 11.

I then lost twenty minutes of my life in a complete blur.

Her examination revealed that I was about 6cm. Huge progress.

Then baby’s heartbeat did something worrying and the emergency button was pressed.

The next thing I knew the room was filled with additional voices and someone was, quite forcefully, telling me that that I needed to be examined again.

I remember someone saying that I was then 8cm. Then it suddenly became 10cm.

A voice asked if I was ready to push. I wasn’t. I was still hoping for an epidural at this point!

I realised that I’d shut my eyes at some point in the previous five minutes. I opened them to find four or five women that I’d never seen before peering between my legs.

One of those women became incredibly stroppy with me. Or maybe the technical term for it is forceful. Whatever it is I’m mighty glad she did!

By 11.06am my gorgeous second daughter came into the world and was placed up on my chest where I was in a complete state of shock, and totally in love.

Active labour lasted a grand total of 17 minutes. Those midwives the night before had been spot on. The cord was wrapped around her neck. Twice.

Our midwife gave me a huge smile, congratulated us and very smugly said “I told you we’d have a baby here before lunchtime”.

Tears running down my face I thanked the stroppy woman for being stroppy, and thanked our midwife and the rest of the team for being the amazing medical professionals that they were. Quite where they had all run from when the midwife pushed the emergency button I have no idea, but they sprang into action and brought our gorgeous daughter safely into the world. Something that I will forever be grateful for.

By 6pm that night, just 24 hours after arriving at the hospital we were back home. Discharged just 6 hours after birth with just a tiny scratch and no stitches. 24 hours which had taken us from being a couple to a new family. 24 of the most magical hours of my life.

I never did finish fixing the pocket in B’s coat though. I think he’s forgiven me for that…

Pregnancy Diary – Weeks 27, 28 and 29

September 5, 2018 by Penny Leave a Comment

Ok. Who stole the summer holidays? As I sit here writing this my kids are back at school for the first day of term and I’m finally coming to terms with the to do lists that have been growing and growing over the summer. Some days pregnancy almost hasn’t had a look in on things. There’s just so much going on in life at the moment that I’ve found myself getting really annoyed with myself for not being able to do everything that I’ve wanted to.

Busy

Busy is the main word that I’d use to sum up the last three weeks. My step-daughter has been staying with us for most of it, and whilst she’s pretty self-sufficient at 14 it has still meant a bit more to do around the house, and also her Dad being off work too. It’s always the case that trying to get work etc done when kids are around is trickier than during term time. Add into the mix getting everything read for going camping and a sudden deluge of data entry work and sleep went out of the window for a while.

Camping during pregnancy

We did manage to make time for a family holiday though and all five of us headed off to Nottinghamshire for five days of camping together. Luckily, we chose somewhere not that far from my Mum, so it was possible to take shelter at her house when the weather really turned, but the trip did teach me a bit about how different camping is when pregnant.

As well as the obvious frustration about not being able to fully do everything like get the tent up and carry stuff, sleeping on an air mattress is tough going. Even more so when the air mattress decides to empty itself on the first night. Thank goodness for a local branch of Argos and the ability to reserve things online! Even with a new fully inflated air mattress though I still found that I needed to walk B up at 1.15am to help me actually get up so I could accompany the five year old on a trip across the field to the toilet block. Still I survived.

Board and card game obsession kicks in

The kids also had an amazing time which is what matters most. It seems that this was the holiday in which they embraced board games like never before. I’ve written over on Penny Plays about how much Master C loves Snakes and Ladders and Ludo, but that’s now turned into more of an obsession. Amazingly none of them asked for TV at all whilst we were away, even when we visited my mum. Instead though the board and card games had to go with us and they insisted on playing them as soon as we arrived anywhere. I can’t complain though as we’re rather big fans too.

All this does mean that the board game buying level seems to have gone up another notch. Not something I thought possible before, but definitely preferable to them just spending all their time in front of a screen.

Top Trumps has also become a firm family favourite too. I’d forgotten how much I used to play at primary school and with all the new versions that are now out my two are trying to collect as many as possible. Long may it continue!

Popping our Geocaching Cherry

The time with all three kids also saw me finally giving geocaching a go. It’s something that I’ve been meaning to do for ages, but just never got round to. I’ll pop something up about it over on Penny Travels very soon, but it’s been a brilliant way of all five of us getting out and discovering new places.

It’s even meant the kid being excited about going on walks. Something I’ve been trying to do for years! They’ve always been fine once we’re out, but actually getting them out of the house with their shoes on hasn’t always been easy.

Pop goes my tummy!

Halfway through our camping trip also seemed to co-incide with me suddenly “popping out” around the week 28 / 29 mark. My midwife tells me it’s common, but it was literally the case that I woke one morning realising that my sleeping bag was somewhat tighter than it had been when I went to bed.

Then, that night, I realised that I couldn’t actually zip the sleeping bag up any more! Fair to say that there was absolutely no chance of disguising this pregnancy after that and also the realisation that I really do need to try to take things a bit easier now.

Back at the midwife

Our return from holiday saw the kids go back to their Dad’s for a bit and an opportunity for me to catch up on work and wedding preparations. We’re keeping things very simple on the latter, but it still feels like my to do list is just growing and growing. It also gave me the opportunity to slot in what I think was officially my week 28 midwife appointment.

With the baby moving about so much more now it’s all feeling much more real than it has done before. There’s a little person going to be joining us in just over a couple of months and I think my head is finally catching up with that concept. This midwife appointment also felt much more like the ones I had with the other kids. Practical things like measuring my bump and listening to the baby’s heartbeat along with also having more blood tests and my Anti-D jab. There really isn’t that long to go now I guess.

Looking forward I’m hoping that the return to school will mean things calming down a bit and a return to a routine for the kids. We’ve had a blast this summer, but I think they too are ready for that regular pattern of doing things in the week as much as I am.

Pregnancy Diary – Weeks 25 and 26

August 15, 2018 by Penny 1 Comment

Pregnancy seems to be speeding up. I’m sure of it!

I’m now at the stage where I think I’ve honestly forgotten how pregnant I am. I can just about work it out if I use my fingers and consult the diary, but it seems that I’m so busy right now that I don’t just have it instantly to mind.

Exhaustion

What I would say about the last two weeks is that I have felt utterly exhausted. I’m not sure if it’s just down to trying to cram in a lot of stuff with all three kids the first weekend, but by Monday and Tuesday I was no use to anyone.

The first weekend had been crazy with a visit to the Dunstable Kite Festival, along with a very long day in London. We managed to squeeze in both a children’s festival and a children’s Prom (watch out for the blog post about it very, very soon) into one day. On opposite sides of London. Without very long at all to get between the two. And without any proper plans for lunch. What I learnt was that I need to slow down a bit. And eat properly. Valuable lessons that I’m trying to take forwards into the rest of the school summer holidays.

Lazy days at home

If there is a plus side form overdoing it though it is realising how much my kids like a day in which we do very little. A day full of board games, television, baking and happily pottering about the house. Don’t get me wrong – the house is a tip at the end of it – but I think we all needed a few lazy days like this. It gave us time to reconnect somewhat and spend some quality time together at home.

Master C has got a bit of a thing for board games at the moment, so when he’s not playing with his trains he’s keen to find someone to play either Snake and Ladders or Ludo with him. Something I’m more than happy to agree to. Well, for the first nine or ten times!

Regaining my fitness levels

Another thing that I’ve noticed with this pregnancy is that I’m nowhere near as fit as I was with the last too. Back then I did the school run on foot and just generally seemed to have so much more energy. This time round I’m desperate to go to bed at the end of the day and in comparison walking and exercising very little.

I’m feeling. bit bad about that. Especially since I haven’t even been able to make it to my weekly aqua natal class for about 6 weeks now.

The only regular bit of exercise I have been getting is when I take the kids to their swimming lessons once a week. I’ve made a real effort to start swimming lengths again whilst they have their lessons. It’s a good thing for me to do – mentally and physically – and I’m realising I really do need to make some time to look after myself a bit better. I need to make time to go for walks and do other bits of exercise, as well as eating better too.

As I sit here writing this I have a week where the kids are staying with their Dad, and I’m trying to use it as an opportunity to get properly organised for the rest of the year. With the wedding and the baby I know that the next five or six months are going to be crazily busy and I also know that I need to be on top of things so nothing gets dropped. I just need to make sure I put time in my plans to concentrate on myself too.

Midwife appointment

Speaking of looking after myself, one thing that I do religiously make time for is medical appointments. I have to admit that I don’t understand people who don’t keep regular appointments. You’re responsible for a little life inside you. How can you not make the time to go and see the Doctor or midwife?

I therefore waddled off to the local doctors’ surgery for my 25 week mid-wife appointment, which was short and sweet. Although luckily not as disappointing as the last one was. This time around I did get to listen to the baby’s heartbeat, but to be honest there wasn’t a whole much more to the appointment.

A quick feel of my tummy told the midwife that baby (unsurprisingly) wasn’t head down yet, and all my blood pressure and urine sample were also fine. I’ve already got the next two appointments with her in the diary and at those I’ve been told to expect another set of blood tests and also my Anti-D injection. It seems the way they do Anti-D is different from when I had my son and daughter, so that’s yet another thing I have to get my head around.

Travelling around

I’ve also been making the most of the times when the kids have been staying with their Dad to accompany B on some of his work travels. I generally find that if I stay at home I end up not working that well as I get distracted by the various jobs that need doing instead. I therefore try and find cafes with wifi near where he is working and go with him and concentrate on my work whilst he is at work. I can make a cheap cup of coffee or tea last a good couple of hours if needs be, but it does mean I get so much more done. At the same time I can also make the most of the car journeys for a bit of crochet or sewing (which is like mental therapy to me!) and get to see a bit of the country at the same time.

Brighton

We were lucky enough to be in Brighton the day before Brighton Pride and loved the carnival atmosphere in the town. I found some gorgeous cafes and shops and even managed to find my wedding dress on a sale rack for the bargain price of £15 whilst there! That afternoon we sat on the beach watching the waves come in and it was just perfect.

Colchester

I also tagged along when he had to go to Colchester, which gave me a perfect excuse to catch up with my blogging friend Mary over a cuppa and piece of cake. We worked out that it’s been about two years since we last managed to catch up in person and it was an excellent reminder of how wonderful some of the blogging friendships I’ve made over the years are. She took me to a lovely vintage tea rooms and we platted a return visit so that we can go to the local board game cafe too. Colchester – we’ll be back!

As if that wasn’t enough as we made our way home, we delayed lunch plans slightly as the heavens opened, but that meant that we happened to be driving past the East Anglian Railway Museum just as our stomachs were rumbling.

Unfortunately the need to get back to pick up the kids meant that we didn’t have time to do the museum itself, but the pair of us loved having lunch in an old railway carriage on one of the platforms as we watched real trains go through the middle of the museum. Yet another reason to return soon.

Norfolk

As if all that wasn’t enough we also managed to squeeze in a quick overnight trip to Norfolk to see B’s family. We figured it was the last chance we’d get before the wedding so we thought we ought to make the effort.

It was very much a flying visit, but no visit to Wells Next The Sea would be complete without fish and chips from French’s. If you’re ever in the area it is the place to go. Don’t let the queue put you off. It’s well worth the wait.

The gorgeous weather also meant that we were desperate to fit in a beach trip and we managed it. Holkham is one of B’s favourite beaches and I totally agree as to why. It’s just so big that even on the busiest of days it doesn’t seem busy. There’s also something completely magical about paddling in the sea and it’s one of those things that I think should be done at every possible opportunity.

Leighton Buzzard Railway

The fortnight finished with a final trip out with the kids to the Leighton Buzzard Railway. Master C is a huge train fan and seeing as Leighton Buzzard is our closest train day out we thought it about time we visited.

Needless to say the kids had a ball (full write up coming soon on Penny Travels) but once again it reminded me how much days out are exhausting me with this pregnancy. Luckily we were able to change our plans and just stay home the following day, but it was another reminder not to plan too much these holidays.

Pregnancy Diary – Week 17

June 12, 2018 by Penny 1 Comment

After a week in which I hardly had time to think about being pregnant, week 17 has been the complete opposite. Loads of time to concentrate on the little one growing inside me and how it feels to be pregnant.

Aquanatal

Firstly , after a couple of weeks off I was finally able to go back to my weekly aquanatal class. I’ve gone back to exactly the same class that I did when pregnant with Little Miss C and Master C and it’s so so lovely to be back. A 45 minute long weekly class run by a midwife from the local hospital and it is just perfect. There’s so much I want to say about the benefits of aquanatal (and I will write that post very soon – especially since Zoggs have given me a couple of maternity swimsuits to review!) but as well as loving the woman who runs it, I just find it a perfect once a week treat to indulge in being pregnant.

It’s also great exercise (if hard work at times!) and wonderful to meet some other women who are expecting babies at similar times. It is a little strange going back as so much has changed since I was last there six years ago. But at the same time it’s nice to also have a bit of a link to my past pregnancies too.

Midwife Appointment

Also this week I had my 16 week midwife appointment down at the doctors surgery. My maternity care has been a bit all over the place so far this pregnancy. Having moved house I had to register with a new doctors practice, and I chose one based on having a community midwife attached to it so that I don’t have to go to the hospital (and pay for their parking) every appointment. They got my notes transferred over and booked me in for a first appointment and there were no problems. At this they organised for the midwife to come to me at home for the booking appointment, but unfortunately a family bereavement meant she had to cancel and then the appointment was picked up by someone else a week later. All fine. These things happen I thought.

That booking appointment all went fine – despite struggling to take blood samples from me – and I was then booked in for the 16 week appointment (in week 17 to avoid having to take the kids with me during half term). To be honest though I’m not really all that sure what the purpose of the appointment was. Yes my blood pressure was taken and a urine sample tested for signs of protein, but that was pretty much it. She looked at my blood test results and told me they were all ok. She also told me to go and book myself in for a whooping cough jab with the nurse, but that was it. No listening to baby’s heartbeat. No asking how I was even.

I left feeling a bit surprised and I guess let down. Pregnancy always comes with a few worries, so I was hoping to at least be measured and his or her heart listened to just to know that everything was OK in there. For our own peace of mind we’ve bought a doppler online, but I’d much rather have had a professional just tell me if you see what I mean.

I have my 20 week scan to look forward to, and she told me that they will finally listen to the heartbeat at the week 25 appointment. Both of those just seem so far away right now.

Tots 100

My final bit of baby related news for the week is that I’m delighted to be the new Tots 100 Pregnancy Round Up Editor. As I’ve said before, being pregnant feels so different this time round. I’m also realising how much I’ve forgotten over the last 6 years so reading pregnancy blogs has filled a bit of a gap in my knowledge. I’m really looking forward to following other blogger’s pregnancy journeys, and continuing to pick up all the things I’ve forgotten from them all!

Being Mum

And in-between all that baby-related activity the week has really just been all about being a mum to my other two. Lots of taxi driving services for swimming lessons and Cubs, as well as a very important 8th birthday to prepare for. I somehow managed to pull off making her the much wanted unicorn cake. Not totally sure I would have succeeded had it not been for B suddenly revealing amazing cake decorating skills that I didn’t know he had! Look out for a “how to” post coming very soon.